Anxiety

It has now been nine (long) weeks since my PM. I am having such anxiety and boutsof crying. I have an appointment to see a therapist and probably start on an anitdepressant which I have always been totally against, but I need to do something for this anxiety. I also feel that I need some adjustments to my PM and I do have an appointment to go in to see to cardiologist for that soon. My energy level is low and I also have a slight headache once in awhile which I have never had many headaches in my life. Any comments???

Sharon

13 Comments

ThaNKS

by 220 chandler ave - 2007-08-05 01:08:50

Jessie

Thanks for the comments. Very helpful. I am divorced so I have to depend on friends and family for support plus this room. I feel the headaches are from my anxiety which also affect your energy leverl.

Sharon

It's Not Easy!

by hooimom - 2007-08-05 05:08:07

Sharon,

We are told how simple the "procedure" is and how quickly we will bounce back and feel better but only those that have gone through it can truly understand the emotional toll this change takes. Nine weeks feels like a long time, but this is still very new for you. It took time for me to totally come to terms wtih my PM. I was 42 when I got my PM a year ago and it was a shock to hear that I would need a PM. I don't know that I would have been happy to hear that at any age but I didn't even know there were 42 year olds walking around with PM (much less those much younger). I cried all night long to begin with, then I just cried occasionally but still was very aware of my PM. I felt different and thought everyone saw me differently. After several months I found myself thinking about my PM less and less. My friends and family got used to me with my new "part" and I began to feel more normal. It is a huge adjustment...something most of us have never imagined happening to us. It takes time to adjust. I think you are a very wise woman to talk to your doctor and contact a therapist. Check out your PM settings with your doctor and make sure you share your feelings at that appointment. If you need an antidepressant for a time to help get through this, then get it. You may find that just talking with the therapist and sorting through all these feelings and changes will help though.

One more thing--are you sleeping at night? I had difficulty with that and it can add to the stress and anxiety.

Michelle

Me Too!

by Vicki - 2007-08-05 05:08:49

Hi Sharon,

I so understand how you are feeling. I am divorced and live alone. Have a boyfriend but feel like I am complaining too much even though he says I'm not.

I just got my PM on July 18th, so I am truly a newbie. I have become very emotional and can start crying so easily. Today I was telling some people about my PM and later in the car coming home I start crying. Wish I never told them, wish I didn't have to have this darned thing in my chest, wish I could stop thinking about it, etc.

If you want a friend to vent to, please feel free to e-mail me. vicster1234@hotmail.com

Take care,
Vicki

Sharon and Vicki,

by bini - 2007-08-05 05:08:54

I too experience alot of emotions after getting my PM (june 27th). I am slowly getting better and less emotional. I think it's just the initial shock of having something strange in your body and getting used to dealing with it. If you both ever need to talk to any one please feel free to email me privatly.
Good luck with everything!

Christine

You are not alone .... ;-)

by pacergirl - 2007-08-05 09:08:58

I would like to say that after I got my Pacer I felt better.... then the reality of my life changing hit me like a building falling on me. I felt that I had no control over my life and that somehow while I was not paying attention my heart had given up on me! How rude!!!! No one asked me if I wanted my life to change... It just did!!! I was angry and depressed. Everyone I talked to said I should be happy I was still alive. Well you know something... I was glad to be alive.... But the fact remained that my body had let me down and because I was in charge of my body.... well I had let me down. That's how I was feeling. I took a lot of love from a very dear friend to get me past the feelings I was having. Now I realize I was mourning the life I had before. My life had changed and I needed to get on with the life that I have now. Now I celebrate everyday that I get another chance to do better. To take care of the body I now have, to love the people I can and be kind to the others I come across. I give thanks everyday for the smallest of things. Getting a pacemaker has indeed changed my life, it just took time to mourn the loss of the previous life and welcome the new one. Good luck to every pacer who is going through this difficult time. You are not alone.
Sincerely, Pacergirl

p.s. I never took the anti-depressents I figure there was a reason I was so sad...... It is a lot to deal with.... but the pills weren't for me.

Happiness is just around the corner

by Rewiredaussiegirl - 2007-08-05 10:08:30

Hi Sharon
I know what you are going through.It is like your mind is in denial for the first few months.We also go through a grieving stage that mourns the loss of our feeling on being in charge of ourselves.I have had my pacemaker for 3years now and hardly give it a thought now.
The Pacemaker club has really been a great help (thanks Blake) along the way and you will get a lot of support here.
Im sure that you will get your confidence back again soon and start feeling that it is great to be alive and getting a second chance with life.-Take care and keep in touch.If you ever feel down just hop on this website and you will get a lot of support! Kay

the first year

by jessie - 2007-08-05 12:08:21

i was told by my husband that the first year he had read where pacemaker receipients are very very emotional. i have certainly experienced it. i think it is common. it is first of all a big shock to find out you have soemthing wrong and need this foreign object implanted to jumpstart your hear. i myself have not gone on antidepressants but i can see how you might think they would be of some help. i found his support helpful and now i am doing somewhat better. everyone is different and if i was still emotional i would certainly ask my doctor about it. my energy level is high again and so i don't have that problem. so god bless you and i wish you all the best. jessie

the first year

by jessie - 2007-08-05 12:08:22

i was told by my husband that the first year he had read where pacemaker receipients are very very emotional. i have certainly experienced it. i think it is common. it is first of all a big shock to find out you have soemthing wrong and need this foreign object implanted to jumpstart your hear. i myself have not gone on antidepressants but i can see how you might think they would be of some help. i found his support helpful and now i am doing somewhat better. everyone is different and if i was still emotional i would certainly ask my doctor about it. my energy level is high again and so i don't have that problem. so god bless you and i wish you all the best. jessie

Hi Sharon

by randrews - 2007-08-06 01:08:04

Your posting hit the nail on the head. I've had my pm for 4 months now. I had the hardest time for quite a while. The doctors kept telling me that everything was fine but I felt aweful. Like you, I never ever wanted to use antidepressents but I got so desperate I started on some. They are ok and I'm not a walking zombie like I was afraid I'd be. I also am seeing a counselor for panic disorder. I never had panic attacks before by pm. I'm doing ok now, I'm not as hypersensitive to everything my body is doing and I just blow off a lot of the weird things I think I'm feeling. It is important to use friends and family to talk to. I didn't wait for them to call, I called them and asked them to come over. This really helped. Talk talk talk. Pray if you are inclined. I also made myself count my blessings. Sometimes I had to work hard to find them. At times I get scared or down about all this but those times are getting farther and further between.
This site also was a life saver. To know that we are normal, that a pm is a big deal, no matter what the doctors say.
Hang in there. It does get better
Rusty

Hi,

by Gellia2 - 2007-08-06 10:08:14

Having to have a pacemaker can be a very difficult thing to get a handle on and all are different in the way they accept it. It can take time. Allow yourself that luxury. I have had a pacer for 32 years now (was 26 when I got it as an emergency). I can tell you that with only a few modifications in my life, I really haven't missed a thing.
As time goes by, you'll think about it less and less. Time is a great factor here. It allows you to be able to see that all can be well and your life will go on. As Rusty said in the letter above me...hang in there. It does, and will get better.
This web site has many fine and comforting friends that can offer so much help. Take advantage of us. I doubt there any who will mind. We're here for you.
Best to you,
Gellia

Thank youy all so much!!!

by 220 chandler ave - 2007-08-06 11:08:05

Your comments have helped me soooo much. In fact as Iwas reading them, I became emotional because this is exactly how I have been feeling. Another factor is that I possibly will have to move because I am now not working but occassionaly because of the fact if I could not come back soon in the capacity I was working, I was put on as a Casual, which means I only work if they need me. But I have come to the conclusion that prayer and putting myself in God's hands and accepting what I have to is what I am doing You all are SUPER and I thank God I found this room.

Sharon

Just what I was thinking

by Fiona_R - 2007-08-07 09:08:33

Sharon before you sent this post, I was feeling the same. I got my PM on Jul 30. Been quite low since then. I have had friends round doing my hair, make-up, anything to feel normal. But when I am on my own, and I realise how much I am pacing, it brings it all home. I think my confidence has been knocked slightly, but I dont intend to go down the anti-depressant route. Make use of your friends and familiy. This site is amazing. PM me if you want, I know exactly how you are feeling. I feel that I have gone from from a happy confident person to being scared and a perhaps a little lonely, no-one understands unless they have gone through it. You like I will find strength.

Fiona

anxiety with pacemaker

by zoe123 - 2020-08-23 16:54:48

Sharon, i too was in your position. At the age of 53 i had a pacemaker put in because of my sleep apnea that went unchecked for many years ruined the electrical parts of my heart. When the Dr. told me i needed one i almost hit the floor. Here is me in great shape, tough and strong turned into butter with this news. After they installed it months later i had a panic attack which brought me to the ER. Never in my life had i had anxiety. But, at the age of 53 i had what is called generalized anxiety. Its the worst feeling. My heart would palpitate and i would get this flush in the face feeling whenever i got it. Its the worst feeling i think. So, i was put on anxiety medicine and it would help but not cure it. Sometimes i think im going to have a heart attack because thats the anxiety talking. As time went on i told myself that this PM is part of me like my heart and organs and its going to help me not hurt me. i started to exercise again and kept myself busy not thinking about it. Eventually, it gets easier with time. Its been 0ne year and four months for me and time has definately helped me. Its not a cure by no means but its a good stepping stone to normalcy. Remember, as soon as you feel anxiety dont fight it but accept it. It only wants to stay for a short stay and leave. At that moment get up and walk and then stop take a couple of deep breaths through your nose with your head up high and think of something or a place that makes you happy. Hang in the Sharon we can beat this together.

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